The Winter Soltice.

I am working on a personal writing project and have been in the flow. Today, I find too much in the bucket so it is about to flood out.

I have read and seen much recently in the carefully crafted halls of my social media affirmation system. I have seen so much of the struggle, pain, and grief of the holidays. My own home is full of mourning and loss during the season.

We mourn and reflect on our loss of spirit, our Christian wonder. We see and feel our losses – empty seats and broken traditions. We mourn the ones not here, both elsewhere by choice or beyond our realm.

Oh, my loves, the pain is deep, real, and at times overwhelming.

I feel lost without my Santa, the hype, the consumer Wolf in Jesus’ birthday clothing.

Tonight, I am found again in the truth of the winter solstice.

The utter destruction of the summer, the frost, the chill, the cold.

This is the sowing of the seed, the swing of the pendulum, long before religion buried every hopeful thing in its dogma.

The real world knew today was special. It is tomorrow that the Sun God returns.

This is the rebirth of hope.

When we see our grief and feel it, our winter feels never-ending, but so it must be. For any hope we have that our own Sun God will return is in the depth and experience of our suffering winter.

We cannot wrap it in pretty paper and adorn it in labels with our gold and silver. I have tried to buy my way through pain, but it waits. Like a frozen lake, it takes time to thaw.

Do not run from the loss, whatever it might be. Hold close to your heart what once was; it has hewn the stone of you to this masterpiece you are. Prepare and watch for spring.

The Sun God comes, for some, it takes a long, painful, and freezing winter. For others, it is squalls, transitioning year in and year out.

I do not take my loss lightly; I stomp and gnash and rage for the reasons, the whys, the controls.

Winter is the Queen , unyielding in her fierce energy and undeniable in her beauty.

Make no mistake, she is death & birth in her complete paradox, like grief she sows the seeds and ethereal beauty awaits.

The loss and pain are real. Look to the horizon when it feels too much to take. The sun will rise again, bringing with it the lighter hearts and better days.

You cannot cast it off, my loves; it must thaw.